Octopus' Garden

Thursday, April 05, 2007


This is a picture of my favorite hat in the Whole. Wide. World.

It is soft and fleecey, and there's a maple leaf, with an embroidered beaver on the other side. (Fuck, yeah!)

(I don't really know why I just exclaimed Fuck, yeah! I guess that's just how I roll.)

I like to wear my favorite hat backwards.

If I thought I could get away with wearing it every single day, I probably would. (So instead I wear it every other day or so, and hope no one notices.) Sometimes it's too cold to wear my favorite hat in the whole wide world, and sometimes it's too hot. This makes me sad.

Occasionally, I fret about what would happen were I to somehow misplace my favorite hat in the whole wide world. (Or should Rabid Marauding Visigoths or Whatnot break into my apartment and steal my favorite hat for use as a Potholder or a Stadium Cushion or a Loincloth or something equally Visigoth-y). And really, I have to say, were I to be permanently separated from my favorite hat in the whole wide world, I don't know . . . things could get ugly.

Certain difficult individuals have, on occasion, teased me about Attempting to Impersonate a Canadian when I wear this hat, but I think that's just (a) rude, insolent, and intrusive, and (b) a reading of the semiotic implications of my favorite hat that, quite frankly, lacks a certain nuance.

(Perhaps tomorrow I will Impersonate an Eggplant by wearing a fleece hat in the shape of an eggplant. See what I mean? That's just crazy talk. Unnuanced crazy talk.)

(And yes, they make fleece hats that look like eggplants. And yes, I want one. Because I happen to really like eggplants. And (recently) cheap beer with copious amounts of olives. And Appletinis. And yum woon sen. And handbags. And hedgehogs. And goldfish. Among other things. Just for the record.)

So, no impersonating of Canadians, although it's true that once I fell in love in Canada and it was very confusing, because I think that what maybe really happened was that I fell in love with Canada. Or something like that.

But that's another story altogether.

* * *

Top Secret Message to The Posse: Poker Alice this Friday at Carey's? 8:00-ish? Come dance with me? (And careful now . . . this Top Secret Message is so Radically Top Secret that, were this Mission Impossible, it would self destruct in 60 seconds.)

* * *

I'm really starting to think that this may be, in fact, my Dumbest. Blog Post. Ever.
posted by Artichoke Heart at 12:27 AM


That is one cool hat. :-)
Blogger Ivy, at 6:02 AM  
I am so diggin' the hat. I also have to thank you for providing me with the PERFECT marginal note for the particular set of papers I am taking a break from grading right now: "Unnuanced crazy talk." Yay!
Blogger Dr. Medusa, at 12:38 PM  
Ivy: Why, thank you! ;)

Dr. M.: And thank you, too! I think that Unnuanced Crazy Talk perhaps deserves its own column/category in a grading rubric. (The No Shit, Sherlock, Grading Rubric.) Could be useful, yes? And perhaps slightly more tactful than my usual (and all-too-frequent) desire to repeatedly scrawl WTF?!?! in the margins.
Blogger Artichoke Heart, at 10:33 PM  
A blog about hats is quite possibly the best of blog topics. I have to keep myself from blogging about my favorite hat everyday. My favorite hat of the moment, was stolen from a boy i imagine has an ugly personality thus validating the theft from the lost and found at my neighborhood bar, the cc club. i love hats and i love your hat. i will be nearer to canada than normal while camping this weekend. I will send them some good energy in thanks for your hat.
Blogger s.m. vanosdel, at 5:47 PM  
How you feel about your cool, beatnik hat is how I feel about my awesome,hipster orange vest, and no one, no one, can take that away from us.
Anonymous Lindy, at 11:25 AM  
SMV: Why, thank you, and I'm sure Canada will appreciate your good energy vibes being sent their way across the border. Hope you had a great time camping! (You should post a hat post about your favorite hat on your blog, no?)

Lindy: You're talking to the choir, sister!
Blogger Artichoke Heart, at 3:06 AM  
Any post that leaves me laughing and saying, "I want her for my best friend" is hardly a dumb post.
Remember that. :)
p.s gilmore girls rock!
Anonymous mbb, at 8:59 AM  
Aw, that's so nice, MBB. MBB, can we be BFF? :)
Blogger Artichoke Heart, at 12:32 AM  
Artichoke heart... yes, we CAN be BFF!!! :)
Anonymous mbb, at 2:41 AM  
A.H., that is a most...appropriate hat. I like. Canada rocks, BTW :).
Blogger Lenka, at 11:25 PM  

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