Sunday, October 29, 2006
NOXEMA
AH: I thought I'd totally shaken it off, but then it came back again. Like a bad case of excema.
SW: You have excema?
AH: No. I'm saying that it came back. You know . . . like excema.
SW: Sweetie, where do you have excema?
AH: I don't have excema.
SW: You don't have excema?
AH: No. There's no excema.
SW: But I thought you said you had a bad case of excema.
AH: No. It's metaphorical.
SW: Metaphorical?
AH: Yes. [A little too loudly, causing other habitués of the local China Trough to look up from their dinners.] That's what I'm saying. It's metaphorical! I have emotional excema!
SW: You have metaphorical emotional excema.
AH: Exactly. Did you know my mother pronounces it egg-zee-ma? So that it sounds like the skanky divorcee of that girly beer drink, Zima? So that it rhymes with that toxic mentholated face wash, Noxema? For the longest time I was convinced that Noxema was an anti-excema topical ointment.
SW: Yikes.
AH: I know! It's awful. And now I need metaphorical Noxema. For my emotional egg-zee-ma.
SW: You have excema?
AH: No. I'm saying that it came back. You know . . . like excema.
SW: Sweetie, where do you have excema?
AH: I don't have excema.
SW: You don't have excema?
AH: No. There's no excema.
SW: But I thought you said you had a bad case of excema.
AH: No. It's metaphorical.
SW: Metaphorical?
AH: Yes. [A little too loudly, causing other habitués of the local China Trough to look up from their dinners.] That's what I'm saying. It's metaphorical! I have emotional excema!
SW: You have metaphorical emotional excema.
AH: Exactly. Did you know my mother pronounces it egg-zee-ma? So that it sounds like the skanky divorcee of that girly beer drink, Zima? So that it rhymes with that toxic mentholated face wash, Noxema? For the longest time I was convinced that Noxema was an anti-excema topical ointment.
SW: Yikes.
AH: I know! It's awful. And now I need metaphorical Noxema. For my emotional egg-zee-ma.
posted by Artichoke Heart at 1:37 PM
1 Comments:
Heh. I free-associate around words in a similar (and for my friends, similarly confusing) manner.
Why can't they keep up???
NB: My "word" to verify that I am not a robot is "puxyax." Just try to get that one out of your head now that you've seen it!
Why can't they keep up???
NB: My "word" to verify that I am not a robot is "puxyax." Just try to get that one out of your head now that you've seen it!