At a recent town social gathering. Imagine something with a Gilmore Girls’ Stars Hollow Town Meeting-esque quality. Only in South Dakota:

She: You’re wearing a very low-cut top.

Me: [WTF? And as part of this sidebar, I feel compelled to state to you, Dear Readers, that top was not all that low-cut.]

She: [Blithely continuing on.] Yeah. We should take you out to a street corner downtown and then we can sell you for beer money so we can have a party afterwards.

Me: [Thinking: Okay, that’s it. Step away from me, Oh Scary Person of the Corn! Back away slowly, and keep your hands where I can see them.] Hmm. Yeah, I don’t think so. [Going for the redirect.] And actually, I think the real issue at hand is whether or not this shirt makes me look like a meringue.

She: A meringue?

Me: Yes. A meringue. I have Meringue Anxiety.

Hey, I love meringue. Although I suppose I wouldn't want to look like one, so you do have a point there.

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Shelley: At that point, Miss Patty said that I did in fact, look like a meringue(!), thus provoking full-blown onset of Meringue Anxiety. (Well, not really. I didn't feel she was entirely trustworthy, so was therefore a potentially unreliable narrator.)

Anne: And yes, exactly. One doesn't want to be wandering about in the guise of meringue. Hence the Meringue Anxiety!

To be honest, mostly I just like getting to say Meringue Anxiety. (Repeatedly). It would be a good name for a band, would it not?

And then Luke and Lorelei barged in and dragged you off to eat a burger with extra fries...

??

Me (to She): Perhaps you should consider getting a job.

Camicao: Yes, Luke and Lorelei did drag me off at that point, although it was not so much burger and fries as Moose Drool and dancing.

Plurp(?): Gainful employment does seem to work wonders in terms of minimizing the need to pimp out other random women for beer money, I find.

I really love meringues, but not as clothing.

M. Luminous

I love meringue so much I want you to look like a meringue. And I want pictures with that.

thanks!

Lee Anne: this person was obviously a couple beers short of a six pack. ~grin~

I have to admit I first misread this as "merengue" and now it's stuck. Each time I visit here I am obsessed with merengue anxiety and the fear of latin dances.